12.13.2002

Is there even a point for Christina Aguilera to be famous, at all? There were a couple weeks a few years ago where, even though she couldn't sing worth doodie, she was at least attractive... now, I'm just not sure what to make of her. Rolling Stone documented her body piercings in text and graphics, and as it turned out seemed to be the high point of the article. When she was on The Daily Show, everyone got a glimpse of her Madonna-like latest reinvention, complete with accent. It's really funny to see a white girl from the more affluent suburbs of Pittsburgh act all street and talk ghetto. And of course, in my mad quest to be master of my remote control, passed by "the M-word" and saw her on some "Unplugged" type show decked out in what can be described as some of the nastiest looking makeup (basically looked like she washed her face with a combination of charcoal, glitter, and vaseline), sounding even more horrible than I remembering her sounding... at one point, totally blowing one of those "fourteen thousand notes in a half second" vocal runs that make Sarah Vaughn and Billie Holliday toss in their blessed graves, and breaking into laughter, herself (I assume out of complete humiliation). She releases that totally stupid "Dirty" video (in all her trampy glory)... does an interview about how she wants to be known as a "spokesperson for the strength of women..." Then, she tries to balance out her extreme trampiness with that "Beautiful" video (interesting video - shitty song)... WAY too late for that, now... A ho is a ho is a ho... Well, I just can't figure out what she's doing in music, and why anybody cares, meanwhile people with incredible talents have to settle for playing for the door at their local shithole bar...

poor use of too much makeup...

cool use of too much makeup...