The Tribulation Has Begun, Pt. II

Just when I had calmed my stomach down after reading that schlocky bullshit email from Fred Durst to Paris Hilton, out comes... yeah, you guessed it - a sex tape - featuring none other than Durst, himself... and my guts are still in several knots.

Apparently, many thought that the "leaked" footage was somehow related to the recent hack of Ms. Hilton's phone... But some research has suggested that the footage may have been "stolen" from Durst's personal computer earlier in '04. Whether this is actually true, or (more likely) Durst himself is behind the "leak" (in whatever retarded attempt to remain remotely relevant to people that couldn't give a shit less about him, anymore) remains to be seen...

At this point, I have honestly begun to feel a bit sad for Freddy. Not sympathetic... he's a dickhead poseur - I have no sympathy for dickheads or poseurs... but sadness. Ms. Hilton, Gina Lee Nolin, Bam Margera, Alison Hannigan (to name a few) have all had footage of their sexual daliances pop up on the Internet in recent months... it smells like maybe Durst may be behind this latest "leak," maybe in an attempt to drum up some hype for himself and his band so that maybe they can sell a few more copies of their upcoming release, or something... which is just... y'know, sad. Even if he's not responsible for leaking the footage, he's responsible for filming his sex acts with this girl, whoever she is... and that's sad on another level, completely.

(NOTE: the link that was here - freddurstsextape.com - seems to have gone away, and so has the subsequent mirror that I posted - freddursthack.com - I'm not gonna bother trying to find it, again...)

My condolences to the girl in the footage who has to be the subject of crap like this.

It's almost like you can actually hear his career ending... listen... hear it? Yeah, that right there.

On the upside, you can now see what it's like when a gay guy has sex with a woman... ("Wait... What is this that my dick has mistakenly stumbled into? It's warm, like my lover Wes's butthole, but not as hairy or as smelly... forget this, I'm getting a limp bizkit. I better go find my man so I can get off for real...")

If anyone is interested, I DO have Fred's confirmed cell number as well as his email addresses (to his Blackberry and otherwise) if you'd like to maybe harass him a little... Contact me and maybe I'll clue ya in. Inasmuch as I loathe him with all of my musical being, I haven't been able to bring myself to fire him a text message or call to inform him of just how big a worthless, irrelevant douche he really is... but that shouldn't stop YOU from doing it if ya want... ;)

Listening to: Kyuss